“Soften your eyes. Relax your face,” I instruct my clients when we are working on deep relaxation in session. And the change is immediate and visible as the lines of tension fall away and a peaceful expression steals over them. When conducting this exercise with a roomful of people, the whole mood of the group changes. You can almost see everyone’s blood pressure go down! For you see, no matter how skillful the face lift, how costly the wrinkle cream, nothing can erase the look of stress, anger, sadness or chronic anxiety from a face when the soul inside is tense and troubled. Inner peace is like a natural face lift. Continue reading
Here is a blog I wrote for Polish: Refining the Details, a summary of my presentation on living a Masquerade…
Growing up I always loved Halloween, I loved scary movies, haunted houses, trick or treating and especially dressing up. I would agonize over my costume every year wanting to have a great one. I still love Halloween and dressing up to go to a costume or masquerade party. There is something very liberating about hiding your true self & pretending to be someone else, rather than who you or who others believe you “should be”.
One mask-maker in California, Carla Almanza-de Quant says “Once you put on a mask you’re cheerful, you’re playful, you’re a more wonderful you,” she says “You become a fantasy character and you interact with others in a more outgoing way.”
What does that look like on a daily basis? What’s the mask or masks you wear when you are hiding your true self from others? Continue reading
What is normal? What does it mean to be normal?
Merriam-Webster defines it as – not deviating from a norm, rule, or principle; conforming to a type, standard, or regular pattern
Not deviating from a norm, conforming to a type…
How many ways do we see culture trying to shoe horn us all into preconceived patterns and norms that it deems appropriate? In how we dress? In how we talk? In how we engage in the world around us? In the clothes, cars and houses we buy?
The problem with trying to be normal is that it’s a myth. Each one of us is unique, one of a kind! There is no other person in the world, that has been or will ever be that is exactly like us. Even if we work to conform to what the world says is acceptable we will still remain our unique selves.
Fighting our uniqueness is exhausting and unhelpful. You are who you are! The quickest way to peace and contentment is find a way to be ok with the person in the mirror.
Sounds great, huh? How do we do that?
- Rather than focus on what everyone else is good at, focus on what you are good at
- Identify your individual and unique gifts & talents
- Acknowledge your areas of weakness and remind yourself that it’s part of being human, we all have them
- Don’t look to material things to fill the hole, it’s all temporary
- Engage your whole self – mind, body and spirit
- Get out and serve others, it can provide some well deserved perspective
How does our self-esteem and body image effect our appearance? Does it really matter since what is supposed to really matter is what’s on the inside, right?
Yes, it’s true that what really matters is what’s on the inside but if our insides (our self-esteem and body image) are struggling then our outsides might begin to suffer. Think about when you have a cold, don’t you put less effort into your clothes, hair, and make-up? I know I certainly do!
When we struggle with poor self-esteem or body image, we may begin to dress ourselves in a way to cover up or hide the body we don’t like. You wake up one morning feeling bloated and gross so you wear more loosely fitting clothes. Then you see your reflection in the mirror in the baggy clothes and think, “Ugh, I’m so fat!”; now you really feel bad about yourself on top of the bloat! Then you go to lunch and get the burger and fries b/c why bother trying it doesn’t matter what you eat, you’re just a hideous, bloated, fat cow. You eat the burger and fries then feel guilty for it because, after all, hideous bloated fat cows shouldn’t eat, ever. Maybe this Continue reading
There are two types of eating disorders, Anorexia Nervosa and Bulimia Nervosa. These are disorders that are considered symptoms of depression and anxiety, they are ways in which teens cope and ways in which they exert control over their life.
Anorexia as defined by the Mayo Clinic is:
“Anorexia nervosa is an eating disorder that causes people to obsess about their weight and the food they eat. People with anorexia nervosa attempt to maintain a weight that’s far below normal for their age and height. To prevent weight gain or to continue losing weight, people with anorexia nervosa may starve themselves or exercise excessively.” Continue reading
There is no denying that we live in a media saturated world. This is a world which constantly bombards us with images that imply what every person should look like. On every runway, fashion magazine, red carpet and tv show, we are faced with the pressure to measure up. This can have a major impact on our body image.
Always attempting to measure up to someone else’s standard of beauty is just asking for disappointment, misery and sometimes self-hatred. I found a fantastic article on the impact of self-esteem and positive self-talk in the context of body image issues in today’s media saturated world.
The author outlines 4 tips that, if practiced, can help improve body image, no matter the pressures of the world.
This is a must read!!