Clumsy Accident or Self-Harm?

As we continue our series discussion on recognizing teen warning signs we are going to touch on two very scary and difficult areas, self-harm and suicide.  These are two teen epidemics that are getting a lot of media attention.  I want to pull the curtain back from all of the media hype and give you some straight forward information.  This post is a focus on self-harm, suicide will be the focus on the following post.

What is self-harm?

Self-harm is deliberate injury that a person inflicts on themselves. 

What is the purpose of self-harm?

This behavior is about control, emotional release and/or an expression of self-hate.  This is a cry for help.  When kids or even adults for that matter feel their lives are spinning out of control, they attempt regain a sense of control through self-harm.  When a person becomes emotionally overwhelmed inflicting physical pain on themselves can act as either a release valve for those emotions or as a distraction from those emotions.  When a person suffers from low self-esteem and self-worth they can use self-harm as an outward expression of their self-hate.

Who practices self-harm?

Mental Health America a leading national non-profit for mental health education and awareness, states “that about two million people in the U.S. injure themselves in some way.  The majority are teenagers or young adults with young women outnumbering young men. They are of all races and backgrounds.”  There is no one type of person that uses self-harm to cope, like many compulsive behaviors it recognizes no bounds.

What does self-harm look like?

Self-harm looks like the following:

  • Burning, cutting, scratching, hitting
  • Marks of self-harm will usually be found on one’s arms, legs, or stomach – places that can easily be hidden from view
  • Other forms of self-harm, includes risky behaviors – running red lights, substance use, promiscuity

Warning Signs to look for:

  • Symptoms of depression or anxiety
  • Inappropriate attire i.e. long sleeves, pants in 100 weather
  • Frequent injuries (bruises, scratches) that when asked about are minimized or elicit defensive responses
  • Isolation
  • Poor self-esteem, shame
  • Change in personality and appearance

To be clear, self-harm is not the same as suicidal thinking or attempts (we’ll address this next week) it is it’s own form of acting out.  While self-harm is very serious and scary, don’t be afraid to talk to your loved one about it directly if you are concerned they are engaging in this behavior.

Dr. Kim Gratz of the University of Mississippi Medical Center says this about self-harm “because self-harm works so well in the short-term to relieve emotional distress, it can be very difficult to stop.”  However, help is available and healing from these behaviors is possible.  If you or someone you know is struggling with self-harm please contact us today.  We are here to help.

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